I think I have become one of the feared ones at my baby basset’s school. I have kinda joined the PTO. I say kinda, because I refuse to let hem put a picture of me on the school PTO board with an official title. They requested a picture last week and I sent them a photo of Mrs. Piggy in a bikini. It’s a cute picture, but not really appropriate for a school announcement board. I guess I have a problem with commitment. I actually do the work that is needed and everyone knows I am on the PTO, but for some reason not having my picture on the board seems to put a little less pressure on me. I am not fooling anyone though. When parents see me coming with my little binder, they know I am going to ask them to volunteer for something. If I was smart I would put the binder away, but I feel like it gives them a fighting chance. Thankfully the younger grade parents haven’t completely figured that part out yet.
Heaven to Betsy (What Doesn’t Kill You, #5): An Emily Romantic Mystery
Pamela Fagan Hutchins
Genre: Romance | Mystery
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2015 WINNER USA Best Book Award, Cross Genre Fiction. A heartfelt and hilarious mystery from this bestselling and award-winning author of the What Doesn’t Kill You romantic mystery series.
When a dead body swan-dives from a balcony into the pool at a wedding, gossip comes to a halt about disgraced paralegal and former rodeo queen Emily — whose husband left her for a woman who turns out to be a man. Enter Jack, a secretive attorney and sexy mix of cowboy and Indian. She refuses to work for him, until she learns about the disappearance of the six-year old daughter of his notorious client Sofia, the wedding shooter, who is also an illegal immigrant. Emily feels a strange affinity with the girl and launches a desperate search for her. Bodies pile up in her wake across Texas and New Mexico as the walls around her own secrets begin to crumble, and the authorities question whether the child is anything but a figment of her imagination.
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The Ruins of Mars (The Ruins of Mars Trilogy Book 1)
Dylan James Quarles
Genre: Action & Adventure | Science Fiction
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Set against the turbulent backdrop of the near future, The Ruins of Mars opens on the discovery of an ancient city buried under the sands of the red planet. Images captured by twin sentient satellites show massive domes, imposing walls, and a grid work of buildings situated directly on the rim of Mars’ Grand Canyon, the Valles Marineris. With the resources of Earth draining away under the weight of human expansion, a plan is hatched to reclaim Mars from the cold grasp of death. A small band of explorers, astronauts, and scientists are sent to the red world in mankind’s first interplanetary starship to begin construction on a human colony. Among them is a young archaeologist, named Harrison Raheem Assad, who is tasked with uncovering the secrets of the Martian ruins and their relation to the human race. Aided by the nearly boundless mind of a god-like artificial intelligence; the explorers battle space travel, harsh Martian weather, and the deepening mystery of the forgotten alien civilization.
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For Whom The Bull Tolls
Rhonda Moser
Genre: Contemporary Fiction | Humor & Satire
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Ginny Parks is an unusual girl. A very unusual girl. Not because she dropped out of mortuary school, although she did. Not because she doesn’t trust babies, although she doesn’t. Not because she has a trust fund, although she does. And certainly not because she has no employable skills, although she doesn’t. Ginny Parks is an unusual girl because she believes with every fiber of her being that a bull is going to strike her dead in six months in a state she’s never been to. Death by bull may not be that unusual but calling it six months in advance makes her pretty odd. She really has no choice but to go on a dream bucket list trip with her sister and bff. She’s lived a relatively quiet life because she seems to mess up everything she tries to do but what difference could that make now? Now she wants to do embarrassing things, see unbelievable things, and eat disgusting things. What’s the worst that could happen? If you’re going to die by bull sooner than you’d like, getting arrested in a foreign country isn’t that bad. Theoretically. Her friends can’t talk her out of this ridiculous notion so they go with her to keep her out of trouble. Will they be able to talk sense into her, or at least keep her out of jail? Is she full of bull or is she right about this premonition? Read For Whom the Bull Tolls to find out what fate has in store for Ginny.
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It’s Their House; I’m Just a Guest
Douglas Kent
Genre: Biographies & Memoirs
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Convicted of Fraud, Douglas Kent is sentenced to 46 months in Federal Prison. This amusing but accurate memoir recounts the time he spent in the Federal Prison system, from the day of his arrival at Allenwood Prison in Pennsylvania through his time spent in a Federal Halfway House in the Dallas, Texas area. Along the way he meets unique and amusing characters, navigates the prison bureaucracy, suffers through the prison medical system, and tries to survive this forced vacation in one piece and his sanity intact. At times funny and at other times emotional and harrowing, follow the ups and downs of low-security prison life and the tedious experience. Laugh, cry, and perhaps pick up a tip or two about how you might make it through your own incarceration should you be unlucky enough to be sentenced to a Federal prison term. The memoir also offers glimpses into other parts of Douglas’ life and what led him to become the person he is today.
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Priscilla the Great
Sybil Nelson
Genre: Children’s eBooks
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Hi, I’m Priscilla, an ordinary seventh grader with some extraordinary gifts. As if middle school isn’t hard enough, not only do I have to fight pimples and bullies, but genetically enhanced assassins trying to kill my family and me! But with the help of my genius best friend, Tai, we’re gonna bring down the evil Selliwood Institute, an organization dead set on turning children into killing machines.
Winner of The Strongest Start Novel competition A Flamingnet Top Choice Book Voted Most Hilarious Read of 2010 by Booklopedia
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